*ring ring*
Hello?
Hey, it’s me. Whatcha doing?
Just getting off of
work. You?
Oh, you know. The usual.
Getting high?
No...Well, a little.
Yeah, whatever. You know you should stop that shit. It makes you paranoid.
Yeah, speaking of paranoid, I might have a little situation
here. I might need your help.
If you shit yourself, I'm not coming.
Actually, -and go fuck yourself, by the way-, actually, some
weird shit is going down at my house. I’m
not sure but it may have been built on an old Indian burial ground.
Have you been seeing
old Indians?
….no...
Is there a little
blonde girl sitting in front of your TV telling you that “they’re here”
…nooo….
Well then, what’s the
problem?
(taking a deep breath) My reflection crawled out of my
bathroom mirror, attacked me, crawled back into my mirror, and now I have no
reflection.
I see. And what kind
of weed have you been smoking again?
Doesn't matter. Remember
all those times we talked about how, if the world ever needed a hero, you would
totally be my sidekick? Well, I think
this is it.
I'm pretty sure we
never talked about any of that. What’s that
tapping noise I keep hearing?
I'm typing all this down.
What for?
Future generations will want to know how this all went
down. How it started, who was involved,
you know.
Wait, I don’t want to
be involved in your drug fantasies, Ok?
Leave me out.
Too late.
(Sighs) Alright, But change
my name.
How about Scooter? I've always wanted a friend called Scooter.
Fuck that. Give me a cool name. Like Max Power, or
something.
Sancho?
What? No, not Sancho.
Too late. So listen, Sancho,
how soon can you get here?
Don’t call me Sancho.
Just get over here, Sancho.
Bring me some mountain dew.
*hangs up*
Most of us live our lives with blinders on, focusing only on what’s in front of us. We create our own
little world around us. In our little
piece of the world, only what’s in it is real.
The lady on the phone at customer service is just a voice. Whether we’re rude to her or not doesn't really
matter, because we don’t really conceive of her as an actual person. This isn't because we’re mean or prideful or narcissistic,
it’s a defence mechanism. As human
beings, we’re simply not equipped to handle that much stimulus. Tragic events will occur halfway around the
world, and unless you’re George Clooney or Angelina Jolie, it barely registers
on our radar.
 |
| Handsome or not, you were a terrible Batman. |
Occasionally, however, you will see something or hear
something that will bring the entire world into focus and you start to notice
things you've never noticed before, no matter how long they've been there. The first time, as a child, that you see your
schoolteacher shopping at the grocery store.
It’s a startling feeling, a shock.
Yes, of course she’s a real person.
But now you know that’s she’s a REAL person, just like you. Before she was just The Woman Who
Teaches. Now she’s Cindy, mom's new
friend, and she talks and jokes and eats grocery store samples just like you
do. You begin to wonder what else you’re
missing, but then you get distracted by a vending machine and your world goes back
to its normal size, plus one more person.
Heading out the door, you bump shoulders with a random person and grunt
an apology, but it’s Ok He’s not real like Cindy is.
 |
| Just blew your mind. |
We all have moments like that, and as I look into the mirror
again and notice all the things it reflects that I never noticed before because
I was always concentrating on how awesome I looked, the me shaped hole where my reflection should be was all the more
disconcerting. If I wasn't already in
the bathroom, I might have shit myself after all.
JrX
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